I am having one of those days. Some days the news fills me with a riotous outrage and I end up cursing, writing radical (and often alienating) facebum updates and tweets, starting or signing petitions (even though I know their valuelessness) and looking for places to vent. Today is not one of those days. Today my heart feels like it is going to explode. I was caught vulnerable this morning by my two current (and forever, actually) soft spots, Gaza and animal abuse. Now before you get hysterical, I am not saying they are comparable in any way, they are justÂ myÂ two soft spots.
The first thing I read about today was the Israeli deputy speaker calling for concentration camps in Gaza and I had to stop myself from crying out loud. I was undone by this last assault on my humanity by the Israeli government and powers that be. But the more I thought about it the more depressed I became. You see, as a Jew (in the diaspora) my standpoint is not the popular one. I am on the fringe, and called self-loathing Jew, anti-Semitic Jew, Arab-lover, to name a few. And I do not get it. I do not understand how we are not the main, majority, wave of massive outcry kind of people, instead of the few ‘crazies’ swimming against the tide. It is hideous, depressing and beyond my tolerance right now.
Then there was the picture of “This dog was left in a cage for so long it rusted shut”. And my heart. My fucking heart. I cannot. I can’t walk around with that feeling all day, of that animal. Of that Giraffe who died. Of intelligent pigs and the abject suffering they endure, to be eaten. I know. I know exactly what I sound like. But today my resistance is too low. And I just want to weep.