I fasted well, thought things, took time out, made a vegan cinnamon bulka to break the fast. It was a win, although I should probably have baked it before and not during fasting.

And I got an email from a far away family member in response to my yesterday’s blogpost. He is somebody who asked with such perfect sincerity and intention about whether it is possible to be atheist and Jewish. Here is my response to him. I would love your thoughts.

“So this is my take. Nobody can tell you what you are, or why you are that thing. Being Jewish is complicated and I have struggled with it for my whole life. Rabbis have mostly not helped at all, because they have an agenda. I did once have a lovely conversation with the rabbi who visited my late dad in the week of his death at the hospital. They had fiery debates and the rabbi loved it. He buried Lazer with such charm and sensitivity.

I love Jewish funerals although I hate the sexism.
I am aware of Jewish privilege as I am aware of white privilege. I have benefitted from both of them (and continue to do so) my whole life, and I know that for me, what I have to do, is fight against racism and anti-Palestine Zionism (Apartheid) whenever and wherever I can. I identify with Jews like Joe Slovo, Ronnie Kassrils, Bernie Sanders (except for his blindness on Israel) and Ruth Bader Ginsberg and Naomi Wolf and Noam Chomsky.

I hate antisemitism as much as I hate anti-muslim sentiment.
So, in a nutshell, being Jewish is something I am, but can’t explain. I am not ashamed of being Jewish but I am very critical of the hypocritical Jewish community, particularly those who are all about money, and prestige and conservatism.
This is just me. I think you can answer some of this for you. Maybe you don’t want to be Jewish. Maybe you can’t help it. Maybe you love stuff and question others. Maybe there is comfort in your community and you even want to go to silly, singing shul for the connection to others even if it isn’t god.
What do you think?”