I woke up this morning looking a bit like a cherry tomato. I forgot to put sun block on my face, thinking I would be protected by my (Jaqueline’s) wetsuit. When we stopped off at Jaqueline’s house for me to try on her wetsuit I wiggled into the bottom half and jumped a little over enthusiastically when she suggested I ‘jump myself in’. She was pulling at the back, you see, and I baleka’ed towards the coffee table and missed hitting it with my head by mere millimeters. I cowboy walked back to the car, before setting off to the surf shop to hire me a board.

Once the guy at the shop had established what I wanted and reiterated the fact that I would be doing very little besides walking the board into the waves and then turning it around and trying to get on it (right on every score), he gave me a thing called a soft board; similar in shape to a mini-mal but much more buoyant. Unfortunately Big Friendly had to carry the thing to the beach because my arms are too short to get it under my armpit, surfer style. I have to carry it with both hands. Before we left the guy said that the rental was for an hour and a half but I could have it for as long as I wanted. He wasn’t nervous that I wouldn’t be back within the allotted time. Right again.

It was great, great fun. It was my first time in a wetsuit. It was my first time on any board of any description, if you could call 10 seconds a pop being ‘on’ something. It was hard work. I am stiff this morning and I didn’t even ‘do’ anything. But I am already planning my week to include another session. Lucky I am underemployed at the moment.

Best Valentine’s prezzie ever.