Who will teach me to diski dance? I keep seeing the ads all over TV, and it looks like the whole of South Africa has been having secret lessons. Now, I’m no dancer, it’s true, but I want to know the steps! I want to be able to break out in a queue. I want to ‘share’ in the excitement and enthusiasm and world cup fever in an entirely non-soccer way; I don’t care much for the beautiful game. I want to be inspired at PicknPoo. I want to diski down Darling Street!

Really, what is the whole point of having a special South African world cup dance if all it is is an advertising campaign? I put a suggestion in at Virgin Active that maybe they could find someone to teach the diski to us, but nobody responded to my suggestion. They probably didn’t take it out of the suggestion box. Along with my others, mainly complaining about the ubiquitous gym cockroaches. I give up with that idea. But, Virgin Active aside, where can we find someone to teach the thing? Anyone know?