I want to put this off and forget about it. I want to not be here and not really do this. You see, I went to the opening night of Absolucy at The Kalk Bay Theatre last night and it was horrible. There are going to be many who disagree with me, and I’ll get lots of comments and people will end up tuning me, but I can’t help it. This show was not only not my cup of tea, it was also not anything else.

This is a one-woman cabaret style fake/true ‘story’ about someone who has talent but also has a drinking problem. It’s a confessional ‘biography’. It’s kinda like an excuse to do some songs, some with added costumes. The great thing is that Lucy Tops has got an unbelievable and amazing voice. She is also a very pretty girl. So we have a pretty girl with an amazing voice, but no show. There is nothing. No story, no character arc, no meaning, no irony, no comedy, no comic timing, no theatricality, no originality. Lucy is a great voice and great physical being with total disconnect between what she is singing and doing, and the material. She is also self-conscious which makes everything seem so fake.

My advice to Lucy is; get an experienced director and workshop the material. Develop the character. Find the style. Commit to the performance in a more genuine way. I know. I should probably lighten up. But Absolucy left me in the dark.